tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3550542818993957125.post6682701131030799056..comments2023-10-30T09:19:50.592+00:00Comments on The Beauty Offensive: I Hate Thisseahorsehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/04006649663400552591noreply@blogger.comBlogger6125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3550542818993957125.post-11600986249456124562008-12-23T17:56:00.000+00:002008-12-23T17:56:00.000+00:00Goldfish, I was still hugely incensed (which makes...Goldfish, I was still hugely incensed (which makes me sound like a large josstick) when I wrote your reply the other day. Now I am deep and crisp and after posting my carol, even, and I can really see the sense in what you write. Thank you.seahorsehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04006649663400552591noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3550542818993957125.post-30446838539200776122008-12-23T17:54:00.000+00:002008-12-23T17:54:00.000+00:00nte thank you. It's such a relief to get some unde...nte thank you. It's such a relief to get some understanding from somewhere!<BR/><BR/>Krishanna hi there! I really appreciated the thought that went into your comment, thank you ever so much. It has helped.seahorsehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04006649663400552591noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3550542818993957125.post-23934594583379605622008-12-23T16:33:00.000+00:002008-12-23T16:33:00.000+00:00Sometimes it seems like we're damned if we do and ...Sometimes it seems like we're damned if we do and damned if we don't. If we remind people we are disabled we are whining, looking for special treatment. If we say nothing we are martyrs, not REALLY disabled, etc etc.<BR/><BR/>I lost a lot of long time friends when I became disabled and family began to treat me differently. They quit asking how I was because they didn't really want to know.<BR/><BR/>What I learned was people who love us and have trouble with how our bodies work when we become disabled is that when they stuff like your sister did, they are really reflecting their own feelings.<BR/><BR/>It's not that you are expecting those things, it's that she feels she has to do that and she she's pissed off about it. For some people it's easier to project than to address our real feelings and cope with them.<BR/><BR/>It has little to do with you and everything to do with your sister, hon. Hang in there.Krishanna Magichttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00267385376959720403noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3550542818993957125.post-67239590721167667332008-12-22T05:43:00.000+00:002008-12-22T05:43:00.000+00:00Oh Seahorse, I'm so sorry. To be treated so unfai...Oh Seahorse, I'm so sorry. To be treated so unfairly by those we love is the REAL burden of having a disability. I often think that if I could just make other people <I>understand</I> then I could cope with just about anything else. <BR/><BR/>Please know that there are some of us who do understand, and who are thinking of you right this minute.Never That Easyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04008749218695113192noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3550542818993957125.post-66857032710279389472008-12-21T21:42:00.000+00:002008-12-21T21:42:00.000+00:00Thank you Goldfish. I hate Christmas. Next year my...Thank you Goldfish. I hate Christmas. Next year my son will be old enough to have all this explained to him. It will be interesting to see who he wants to spend his time with. Fortunately I already know the answer to that one.seahorsehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04006649663400552591noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3550542818993957125.post-10838308001969915852008-12-21T20:46:00.000+00:002008-12-21T20:46:00.000+00:00I'm so sorry, Seahorse. You know such comments ar...I'm so sorry, Seahorse. You know such comments are far more to do with power than what your sister really thinks - they are unanswerable, unjustifiable. She wouldn't actually assert that someone who doesn't look sick can't be sick. Or that someone who is sick can't have good days and bad days. But she can jab you with such comments and if you protest, well <I>there's no need to be so defensive</I>... <BR/><BR/>I hope your relationship with your sister will improve, but sounds like just now she is poking you for the sake of it, out of her own frustration I daresay. "Your eyes burn too brightly" is like something a villain says of the heroine in a bad romantic novel.<BR/><BR/>The word verification says "boing" which I take to be the sound a spring makes. Hope that's portentous.The Goldfishhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15213378454070776331noreply@blogger.com