Sunday, 21 December 2008

Christmas is Bollocks

Right, forget the compilation CDs because this is the only Christmas song you're going to need. To be sung with gusto (or with Shane MacGowan)...


Christmas is bollocks!
A fa la la la laaaaaaaaa.
Christmas! Bloody bollocks.
A fa la la la laaaaaaaa.

Bollocks to fairy lights
And bollocks to wine
And bollocks to Christmas cards
To thee and to thine.

Christmas is bollocks!
A fa la la la laaaaaaaaa.
Christmas! Bloody bollocks.
A fa la la la laaaaaaaaa.

Bollocks to tinsel
And bollocks to pies
And bollocks to presents
All wrapped up in lies.

Chorus

Bollocks to turkey
And bollocks to cake
And bollocks to everything
It’s all a big fake.

Chorus

Bollocks to crackers
And bollocks to fun
And bollocks to Yuletide
Merry Christmas, everyone!

Christmas is bollocks
We all know its true
Christmas! Bloody bollocks.
And this one’s for YOU.


Ta daaaaaaaaaa! I feel better now. What’s that? Oh sod off. Nuts to you all. Especially brazil nuts. I hate brazil nuts.

10 comments:

S. said...

Clapping!

Stephany said...

As a contributor, and co-founder of the new A Hoy Blog Award, I would like you to receive the Inaugural (very first round)presentation of the award. Please find it on my blog, 'soulful sepulcher'.Congratulations!-Stephany

Cusp said...

As you are feeling a little 'arsey' and enjoying rude words you might enjoy a 'Flanders & Swann' fave of mine ;0)

Ma's out, Pa's out
lets talk rude
pee, po, belly, bum, drawers
lets run through the garden in the nude
pee, po, belly, bum ,drawers
lets write rude words all down our street
stick out our tongues at the people we meet
lets have an intellectual treat
pee, po, belly, bum, drawers.

seahorse said...

Hi S. Hope that's in approval ;-)

Stephany, thanks so much though I'm not sure a hissy fit deserves an award.

cusp: This is the home of arsiness over the festive period and so your ditty is most welcome.

Anyone else feeling in a similar vein, blast away!

Cusp said...

Knickers ! (just for the sake of it)

seahorse said...

Arse!

Donimo said...

All I know is "Wreck the malls with cows on Harley's. Fa la la la la..." Not quite as edgy as yours.

Now that the 25th has come and gone, is it safe to ask you if you had any Christmas cheer?

Miss Vertigo said...

Aaahh, that's brilliant!

MV

seahorse said...

Miss V! Hello there. Thank you

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